one year later

Today {October 18, 2011} is one year since the beginning of my weight loss journey.

Wow - I have come a long way.

Last month I blogged about wanting to lose another 5 pounds by today, and I'm happy to say that I have lost over 7 pounds this last month!

That is a total of 43.2 pounds in the last year!

To be honest, I have mixed feelings about that number. I'm STOKED about the weight I've lost, but I do also wish (and expected) to have lost more than that. I know I can't focus on what could have been, but rather, I need to focus on what I've accomplished.

I've also grown a lot emotionally and spiritually. even today I had yet another "breakthrough" during my devotions. I'm doing the Bible study, "Breaking Free" by Beth Moore, (which I highly recommend). I've learned a lot and continued to work through my weight loss and food issues through this study. Today, I read Psalms 45:1-15, and verse 11 really hit me.

"The king is enthralled by your beauty; honor him, for he is your lord."

(reread that if you didn't catch it).

The KING OF KINGS thinks I'm beautiful! Also, I need to honor him. I don't always honor him, especially when it comes to my weight because I'm often eating things I shouldn't or putting myself down for not being better, thinner, more. But he thinks I'm beautiful, so the least I can do is honor him with my actions, thoughts, body, words, all that i am. and no matter how I feel, no matter what the scale says, no matter what I look like, no matter what size clothes I wear - HE thinks I'm beautiful and I am His Beloved. I don't always live my life like I'm a beloved daughter of the King. It's definitely easier said than lived out, but I'm making strides to believe this truth even on my bad days - I am His Beloved.

So, I have set some new goals for this next year - some short term, some long term - all of them a bit overwhelming. But I've lost this much, so I know I can keep going and keep losing and keep improving.

Thanks to all of you who have supported me thus far on this journey, and for your continued encouragement and support. You don't know how much I appreciate it.

Love,

{a smaller} Lauren